I suppose my brain went into overdrive this past weekend. Sean and I had gone over everything with our Reproductive Endocrinologist and our Fertility RN Coordinator last Thursday and I was like “Yea, we got this shit. I’m ready!” Then I got my menstrual cycle Sunday morning and panicked.
My endometriosis is already making its regrowth known with the pain of the last menstrual cycle and this one. I kept thinking I HAVE to get my Hysterosalpingogram (HSG) Test done during this period because I can’t afford to wait next period! I can’t waste time!
I was trying to call the office numbers given to me that are open during the weekend BUT NO ONE ANSWERED. The automated message said if I leave a message they wouldn’t be able to respond until the next day. I then sent an email but received an out of office response saying they wouldn’t be in until Monday.
In my mind: “NOOOO!!! I only have 3 days after today to get this HSG done! And I have to find someone to take me because Sean is stuck at work and I’ll be in la la land with the Valium and I need to get my boss’s okay…and…and!”
Sean calmed me down with a kiss on the forehead and supportive words. Then later, after some pain medication, food, and rest—my own logic calmed me completely down. There was nothing I could do if they weren’t getting back to me.
This morning I received an email apologizing for no one answering my call. The email was from the clinic’s Financial Coordinator and she explained that they have not yet received the okay from our health insurance and it could take up to 2 weeks until they do get the okay. If I were to get the HSG done before then I’d be paying $690 out of pocket. My brain was like “NOPE! I’m goooood. I’ll waaaait *slowly retreats back into my blanket sanctuary*” I went into work late today, by the way. Menstrual/Endo pain + Reoccurring Back/Nerve pain = hard to walk/sit. So I rested flat on back until the pain medication kicked in. I pretty much looked like a burrito on the floor.
I’m in “We got this shit!” mode again. Yea, it sucks major bullocks that I can’t get the HSG done and out of the way. It sucks that my uterus is already feeling heavy pain during cycles again. But we’ll just do what we can and if it gets worse, I’ll have to just pull the plug on this whole thing and go on birth control to stop more cysts from developing.
I know this is kind of a repetitive train of thought that I’ve said before in old posts when I was trying to go through this process the first time but back then it would’ve been a total waste of time and money. I should’ve actually went on birth control at that point too when I decided not to do it but I kept thinking maybe a miracle would happen naturally.
The IVF would’ve failed because my uterus was in seriously bad shape. The first laparoscopic surgery seemed like it helped but the second surgery was a flop and the pain only doubled. The third surgery was done by a specialist surgeon who focuses on severe cases such as Endometriosis. He did a seriously good job in removing a lot of the cysts/fibrosis/endometriosis. I can have sexy time without pain and it’s great! (Sorry TMI lol) Buuut, the cycles are bringing them back bit by bit. So it’s now or never with this IVF adventure.
At some point this week I’m going to get the surgery notes sent to the fertility clinic and next week we’re getting the blood tests done. Today I’m just going to chill the fek out and work.
We got this. 👍