My body is a jerk

What started as a leak turned into a deluge within hours. Lord knows what pushed my body to procure a menstrual cycle two weeks early.

So yea the answer to what I was experiencing from the 4 possible reasons of why a female would experience watery blood down stairs is: none of the above. No pregnancy and no light period. It was like I skipped to the second day of the menstrual cycle; started out dainty then went waaay heavy. Part of me wonders if it was some sort of miscarriage or some belated response to the HSG test. *shrugs*

I decided not to bother my gynecologist since I know now it’s definitely a period. And before the cycle even got heavy I did the early pregnancy test and it was a definite, crisp “not pregnant.” Part of me wished it was pregnancy though it wouldn’t have made any sense whatsoever if it was.

Good news is we finally got the blood drawn today for the tests. 6 vials. I had to fill up 6 vials for the blood tests and I’m small. Like petite with petite veins so it took awhile and my hand even got tingly. Sean only had to get 3 vials of blood taken. WTF? lol. Though I do have a longer list of things to test than he does. ┬áStill sucks. Now it’s time to set up the follow-up appointment and find out which steps to take next! ­čśÇ

Sincerely,
Jenn

 

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Heh Say What Now?

I’m a bit confused right now.

So, I kept getting weird cramping last week and thought “Oh, I must be getting my period again.” Then my friend interjected, “But didn’t you just get that a week ago?” Cue extremely puzzled expression and grabbing the nearest calendar.

My friend was correct. I had gotten my period not too long ago. June 25th to be exact. And then I recalled all the hysterical whatnot I went through to get testing done for the fertility clinic. So why the heck was I feeling cramp-y and overly drained for??? I shake off the whole thing and blame it on my endometriosis acting up like usual.

Then today happens. I’m just working away at my cubicle when I take a deep breath and am graced with the sudden sensation of pissing myself. I sit there, eyes wide and wonder “Did I seriously just piss myself?” I took another breath and BAM, similar sensation but realize it’s coming from my uterus. I rush to the bathroom and see blood. My first thought “AUGH! It’s my period!” then I pause and rethink. It’s too fek’n early for my period. “AUGH! I’m dying!” cue flashbacks to a 12 year old me actually thinking she’s dying because she forgot periods were even a thing.

I notice something else about this blood. It’s watery. I heard at times when discharge mixes with blood it becomes watery. But why was I getting this and why so early if this was actually a very early menstrual cycle???

Google, dear disembodied friend, you have presented many explanations for me. Thank you.

First answer: “CERVICAL CANCER” … *illogical panic attack* *logic floats by* I already received word that no cancer was discovered during my surgical procedure down in my nether regions. *relaxes*

Second answer: “4 Causes for a Water Period & What You Can Do About it” …┬áThank you random person who decided to make an article about this.

  1. Post-Pregnancy Periodsnope, haven’t given birth
  2. Lighter Periodmost likely, but still really weird it’s so early
  3. Pregnancyyes, please?
  4. Labor Signsnope, jumpin’ the gun there~

During my cramping last week and wondering why I was receiving them so early, I ordered an early pregnancy test pack along with our usual monthly amazon pantry restocking order. Whether it be by fate or coincidence, that package was delivered today. So tonight we’ll rule out whether or not pregnancy is actually a factor in this watery blood scenario. If it’s not pregnancy, my gyno will be receiving an appointment with me where I can bombard her with questions and receive answers that will calm my brain down, lol.

The female body is such a tiresome and confusing entity.

Sincerely,
Jenn

Freedooom!

Thank God that someone was finally in billing the day I decide to call one last time. After my physical therapy this afternoon, I felt this urge to call the surgery clinic. A lady whose name sounded familiar (from when I called 3 months ago) answered, and I told her the scenario with the insurance claims and insurance letters and what ensued was interesting.

“Whaat? Oh no no no…” she starts. I’m just like “Huh?”

She explains that they don’t follow what the claims are saying nor that new claim I saw. And that they would never make the patients pay those amounts. She looked at my insurance info and my account info there and said I’d only have to pay $560. No one would ever make me pay what the insurance was saying I may have to pay. Though the amount owed also confused me some because someone, possibly she, ages ago said $5000 so I have no idea what’s going there but hey I’ll take the $560 and skip along happily to the fertility clinic.

I can continue my fertility journey and that is all that matters me to me.

SO FEK’N HAPPY NOW! I LOVE YOU ALL! *HUG*

Sincerely,
Jenn

Crying

For awhile I’ve been feeling overwhelmed to the point of wanting to cry but the tears wouldn’t come. Now they’re here but I’m desperately trying to hide them since I’m stuck in a public area.

Unknown bills have been whirling in my head since that last post. Calling the surgical center seems fruitless really. They’re great with the before and during process of surgery but everything after they suck at communication-wise. The billing guy is never there and the front desk ladies have that “I don’t have time for this” tone.

I had to endure that tone again this morning with the same lady as before. I called for a different reason though. Mind you, I’m not calling every day for things. I called a few times in one day a few months ago. That day I talked to three different people so I could talk to who I needed to talk to about the main surgery bill. After three months, I called the day I saw the random claim only asking if they had sent the bill yet and finally again today in search of my operation notes.

So yea, I told her I needed my operation notes but could not find them in my online health profile. She left me on hold three times. Second time she forgot and did the whole “Hi I’m blaa, how may I help you?” and I respond in with a twinge of sarcasm “I was put on hold for my operation notes, heh.” Heard her tone change and an exasperated noise come out of her and she put me on hold again. She later hurriedly admitted that the notes were not yet accessible to me before but they are now and finished with that whole have a good day thing.

The tears came from reading the operations notes:

  1. Laparoscopy, surgical; with lysis of adhesions (salpingolysis, ovariolysis) (separate
    procedure) (58660)
  2. Ureterolysis, with or without repositioning of ureter for retroperitoneal fibrosis (50715)
  3. Excision or destruction, open, intra-abdominal tumors, cysts or endometriomas, 1 or more peritoneal, mesenteric, or retroperitoneal primary or secondary tumors; largest tumor 5 cm diameter or less (49203)
  4. Chromotubation of oviduct, including materials (58350) Hysteroscopy, surgical; with sampling (biopsy) of endometrium and/or polypectomy, with or without D & C (58558)
  5. Cystourethroscopy, with dilation of bladder for interstitial cystitis; general or conduction (spinal) anesthesia (52260)

They did all of that. All of that was the reason I was in so much pain and couldn’t get pregnant (excluding the bladder part. Not sure what was happening there.) And now all that will probably equal to that dreaded $11000 that keeps popping up in my mind. Because that random claim is for real and the provider name is also in the operation notes. He was a surgical assistant who had removed the abdominal growth I had no idea about.

It’s like in those mythical stories. If you truly want something big, a heavy price must be paid. I wanted to be free from all that pain. And the price may be the baby I’ve always wanted. I can’t keep trying naturally because the endometriosis and growths will regrow; I’ll have to go on birth control to stop the regrowth. Fertility help was my last chance to have my own child and I wanted to get it done while I was young and still have half my egg supply!

I know, I know. I’m being over-dramatic. But… I can’t help it…

I just wish they’d send that damn bill so I know what to do next. If it’s not my body that’s in pain, it’s my heart. And I’m just so tired.

Sincerely,
Jenn

Valium Makes Me Sad

I should seriously stop looking at my claims section in my healthcare member account. The “You May Owe” parts send me into a frenzy every time, lol. Today I saw a $6000 bill for an abdominal growth that was removed during the day of the big surgery I had for the removal of my endometriosis. I’m not sure how I didn’t see the bill before and no one said a thing about abdominal growths. I swear they need to give me all the details so I don’t keep getting random little heart attacks.

I called my health insurance just to get the low down on it and once again I got another nice lady to explain what she could. In the end, I just decided to shake it off and continue waiting for the conflabbit bill from the surgery center before I kick up any fuss. I called the surgery center as well, by the way. Told them the bill was processed with my health insurance three months ago and was wondering if they sent the bill of what I owe yet. The lady at the front desk said “Oh it can take up to 45 days from the day of processing… yea, it’ll take awhile…” Well, she got the “take awhile” part right. It’s already passed the 45 day mark, lol. I reallllllly hope I’m not going to get a random $11,000+ bill that combines the 10% co-payment with this random $6000+ bill for an abdominal growth no one even mentioned to me.

Health bills suck bullocks.

On another note, my HSG x-ray test yesterday went well. I had taken Valium so that the procedure wouldn’t be so bad but apparently I didn’t really need to. According to the nurse practitioner, because of my endometriosis, the pain and discomfort one would normally receive from the procedure would be nothing to me since…y’know…I deal with this shiznitz everyday.

However true the remark is, I still felt that prick from the needle ( Ó▓á__Ó▓á ) I feeeeelt it and I didn’t like iiiit.

Anywho, the dye they injected showed that my tubes weren’t blocked. Good to know! Also confusing. So far I’m receiving news that my uterus is pretty good despite everything it’s been through. So why am I not getting pregnant through normal means? Is it the inflammation? Do I have a tilted uterus? Is there a faulty cog somewhere that they haven’t seen yet? Is it the random increments of sugary foods that I’ll eat in times of stress causing problems?

All that’s left on the to-do list is the semen test, which will occur on the day of the follow up appointment with our doc, and the blood tests for both Sean and me that we decided to get done next Tuesday instead of this past Wednesday. Socializing with family seems to drain us, lol. We just couldn’t function normally after the evening we spent at my cousins for July 4th so we decided to just deal with the blood tests next week. Then my back once again decided to crap out on me and I couldn’t get into work on Wednesday because of the nerve pain.

Speaking of said back issues, I overheard Sean talking on Viber with his dad that day. His dad asked how I was doing and Sean said my back began paining me badly again so I couldn’t go into work. His dad, in his blunt Irish way of thinking, says “Ah, she needs to do something, Sean. She doesn’t do anything. Get her to do some sets with ya, ha ha.”

… hah… hah…

I love family. Truly I do. But when they assume nothing is being done about something big that I’ve been doing all I can afford to do for—it irks me. I know he was just saying things from whatever he’s gathered from his point of view, but there’s much he does not see. Much he does not know. So to assume is just kind of silly of someone to do in my opinion. But, alas, it happens all the time with everyone. Even I will do it at times until I catch myself and backtrack. I’ll get over it in a few days. To continue to be offended by something that trivial enough that his father won’t remember what the heck he said months from now? It’d just be a waste.

I was quite illogically depressed yesterday and I’m guessing it was the Valium. Like deep down I knew I had no reason to be sad and depressive. But I kept swelling with random bouts of sadness, drowsiness and the occasional “I feel like crying but the tears won’t flow.”

I no longer feel sad but I do feel anxious about health bills. :\ My mom suggested I check out NaPro since health insurance covers it instead of going the IVF route. At this point, I don’t fek’n care. We started this road. I already have debt waiting for me and you only live once. After we hear what the doc has to say from our tests and are told all the possible costs, then we’ll make the decision on if we should veer off the current route and try another. Until then I don’t want to hear any “try this” or “do this” shit

( =__=)

All this sounds so bee-atchy of me, lol. Apologies.

Sincerely,
Jenn